I have a friend (no, this really isn't about me) who is REALLY pretty and rather well known around town, as she is on TV here every day. And really, she's just very, very pretty. And smart. And nice. And single.
So she met this guy, who asked her out. They made definite plans and he was to call her Friday afternoon to firm them up (time he'd pick her up, etc). I saw her out with some mutual friends Friday night looking rather glum. The guy never called Friday. And she tells me this morning he hasn't called since.
Why do men do things like this? I don't get it.
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15 comments:
Because he met somebody better looking between the time he asked her out and Friday.
Sad but true.
He could've been scared. Or abducted by aliens. One or the other.
Yes, we have theorized that it could have been aliens. I told her that she should arrange to have him abducted by aliens... and probed. What a jerk.
PS: Scared of WHAT?
Scared...of what?
1.Showing up in her friend's blog after the first date, with his every move being dissected.
2.Dating someone who's on television who is also very very pretty. Could be threatening to the male ego.
3. Dating anybody at all--very scary.
well, if he hadn't stood her up, i wouldn't have written about it.
and if she intimidates him, why ask her out at all?
and what's scary about dating? okay, i've had some scary bad dates, but you just excuse yourself early and never go out with them again. problem solved.
Yeah, it's rude not to call, and I think that I haven't done that as an adult. And, maybe he is just an asshole who makes dates and leaves people hanging just to be mean. But you ask "scared of what?"
I'll tell you scared of what.
Maybe he freaked out that someone so "very, very pretty. And smart. And nice." would want to go out with him and just lost his nerve. After all, why would she be interested in him? Maybe he decided he wasn't good enough and was too embarrassed to call her and admit that she was too good for him. "She's a freakin' TV star for chrissakes. Why would she be interested in me? What would we talk about?! What was I thinking? I can't call her."
Even though she already said yes.
"Women like that just aren't interested in me."
It's hard to call someone to arrange a date, even after they've said yes. And if she's a beautiful smart, local celebrity, it's harder. That is, unless you're a superhero. Or a sociopath.
Or maybe he lost her number. Or is in a coma. So she could (1) write him off, (2) contact him indignantly, or (3) suggest that there must have been some misunderstanding. But I'll admit that the line between being gracious and a doormat can be blurry.
And yes, Kate, I know you know who I am. You needn't prove it publicly. And I certainly don't want your vote on the superhero/psychopath question.
Ummmm...I actually DO NOT know who you are. I really don't.
OK, so I do know who you are. And I don't believe you would ever, EVER do that to someone because you have the nicest manners of any grown up man I know.
Could someone PLEASE explain the whole male ego thing? I just don't get it. I really don't.
--female ANON
Do you mean men who have incredibly large egos that cause them not to call women whom they said they'd call? Or to you men men with incredibly small egos that cause them not to call women whom they said they'd call?
Size doesn't matter. LOL!
But what IS it? The way people talk about it, it seems mostly to be some element of the male personality that is fearful of in any way not being dominant, being the best, being in control. Is that it???
Oh. That. That's easy. That's not ego. A prevailing model of family and home is the strong father model which puts the male (usually) in the position of being expected to be smarter, stronger and a better provider in almost every area, except for child care and nesting. This explains how it is that men can marry women who are clearly not their equal (younger, not as smart). It's much more difficult to negotiate a relationship where both people are expected to participate as equals. And lots of women like/want to be in relationships like that and are thereby happy to act dumb or be with people that they don't or can't challenge intellectually.
There are probably some men who don't want to be expected to be the best or in control but feel that it is what is expected of them.
"There are probably some men who don't want to be expected to be the best or in control but feel that it is what is expected of them."
And are these men able to function in rltps as equals? Or when women take the pressure off, by only really wanting an equal rltp, that the the infamous male ego kicks in? And even these men just can't let go of that expectation that others hold of them?
From clues elsewhere on this site, I think I know who you are talking about. He must be in a coma or been abducted. In my book, she is numero uno of the channel 10 hotties.
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