In reference to the discussion below about teen sexuality, here's something I wrote about TEEN PREGNANCY for Metro Pulse.
And here's a post I wrote on my old blog a few years ago about why "teen sex" isn't necessarily SUCH A TERRIBLE THING
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8 comments:
One of my high school friends became pregnant at 16. She was an honor student and managed to graduate a year early, in spite of her parents throwing her out of the house. (She stayed with us for awhile and then got her own place. ) She went on to college and then earned a masters degree in short order.
Looking back, 18 years later, I have no idea how she managed and managed so well. Society certainly did not make it easy for her. Mad props all around to anyone who can succesfully juggle school with a baby.
Combining education with parenting is difficult, even as an old married lady in her 30s with plenty of support and resources. (me.)
One of my first jobs out of college was working with teen moms/dads while they finished high school. It is incredibly difficult to go to school, work, study, and take care of baby.These girls should be praised for completing their education.(I know I didn't say anything about praising the teen dads:it is much easier for the guys in our society and many of them don't help anyway.Those who do should also be praised).As far as not wanting school personel to discuss sex related issues: we have to because many parents just can't see their kids as sexual beings.Also, many kids are terrified of consulting with parents because of abuse etc. When discussing sexual matters with young girls I never, never interject my feelings: just the facts and where to go for help etc.
I got pregnant when I was at the prom but I sure wasn't the queen (I wish) Anyway, my boyfriend said that he couldn't wear any protection because it did not "feel right." I have three kids now and am on to man #3. I managed to get my GED. Boy was that test hard!
well I am sure as much as you love your kids you would probably have preferred to have taken a different road in life wouldnt you have? thats why sex belongs inside marriages. I do not condemn anyone for making mistakes because lord knows I have made a ton of them myself but supposed adults leading children into decisions that will change the course of their lives (and not neccessarily for the better) just fries me. while the blogger can talk about how "creepy" this prom is (and I do agree that some of the means to the right ends may not always be the best way to go about it) it is even MORE creepy to think about a supposedly responsible parent encouraging their teens to engage in non marital sex. I would ask if "following her feelings" served the blogger that well. perhaps if she had not been engaging in non marital sex she would not have been drawn together with a man such as her ex husband who was such a sexual opportunist (assuming that is even true and not just the spin she has put on it to make herself out to be the perfect victim). despite the liberal blab it appears what Katie wants, long term, is what the more conservative among us want: a life partner to raise our children wtih and be faithful to us. I would ask if sexual activity before marriage is the best way to accomplish that goal? I have thought long and hard about it over the years because I want to have some real tangible stuff to say to my kids about why to wait beyond scare tactics about stuff that may or may not happen (because given that life is a risk anyway a kid might well ask why is it OK to take a chance by participating in a dangerous sport but not by having sex???) for better or worse here it is: premarital sex, even under the best circumstances encourages people to objectify each other and use each other. there are those who say well we were in love and did it before our wedding but if you look at this closely (and this is important) these people had ALREADY MADE A MARRIAGE LIKE COMMITMENT TO EACH OTHER BEFORE SEX EVEN IF IN THEIR MINDS THE WEDDING WAS NOT THE MOMENT WHEN THAT OCCURRED. in reality this actually backs up the idea of waiting because these folks still found sex to only find its context in a relationship where permanent commitment was a given even if their timing was off.
non marital sex has shifted our perception of sex away from an act of love to a performance sport that must be mastered OR ELSE you will be alone. I am not sure that I buy the thing about fully knowing people simply because in bible times most marriages were arranged so no doubt they knew each other as well in nonsexual ways as they did sexually and that is not very well prior to marriage. I really think it is the shift in how one thinks of sex that is the main reason. along with, despite individual single parents doing just fine,(I was raised by a single mom btw) a way to help kids grow up with both parents along the big picture of things.
I think the world would be a much better place is sexuality were taken out of the "dirty, forbidden" realm and aired out. Today's teenagers would have been married with kids a hundred years ago, most likely. Of course they have have sexual urges, and they need to feel like they can talk about it and even act on it without getting busted by their parents.
What I can't stand about this kind of mentality (the "purity ball" families) is, where do the homosexual kids fit in? I know where - nowhere! If all girls have to wait to marry men before they have sex, and all boys are supposed to wait til they get married, then do gay kids just not get to have sex?? LOL
I'm not a parent, and almost certainly never will be, but parents need to be teaching their kids that sexuality is a part of being human, whether gay or straight. Just a little bee in my bonnet.
What century do you all live in? Fathers, husbands and the church do not have the right to own a women's sexuality.
HAVE AN ABORTION!
Wolverine and Lydia should hang out together. Nobody cares that you are gay and a latina! Stop talking about it!
I'm almost afraid to ask (you seem mad a lot of the time) but is your name Lydia or La Tina?
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