being married

I've been married about two months now. Not that long, but long enough to know that I made the best decision of my life.

I was married previously for 13 years, and despite good intentions by two VERY young people on the day we plighted our troth, it was a decade-long relationship of clashing expectations and crushing disappointments. And at every point during my adult life, I've been surrounded by many marriages in various states of distress. I've come to the conclusion that not much is more painful on a day-to-day basis than a bad marriage. I've watched people I love slowly wither away from the hurt of an unhappy or profoundly unsatisfactory marriage. Give me single-hood any day over an unhappy marriage. I've done both and being single is far better than staying married just to stay married.

I've also had the good fortune to observe a few marriages that make both parties better people, happier people, and better parents, and that's what I hoped for when I decided to marry again.

That's what I got. Jon is such a a great man, and a wonderful person in my children's lives, and a great member of our extended family. He's patient with my many flaws and notices the things I do well.

I am lucky and happy.


Anonymous said...

Blah, blah, blah. That post was sappier than a bottle of Aunt Jemima.

katie allison granju said...

Yeah, very sappy post. I am feeling all newlywed-ish, I guess ;-)

jon said...


Anonymous said...

What a lovely posting!

Debra said...

Your posting is lovely. I am sincerely happy for you and you give me hope.

I was married for 13 years, too. You are correct in that many people wither away in unhappy marriages. It can seem so difficult to bring up the topic of divorce and to actually leave, but it can be one of the greatest things that can happen.

CHEZ BEZ said...

Very good post. It does resonate.