I am faced with two or three rather big decisions at the moment and am finding it difficult to come to definitive conclusions. My choices depend on a momentous leap of faith and I am anxious.
So I'm looking for good advice; how do you ponder and then settle on conclusions when you have major decisions to make? How do you decide when to close your eyes and jump, trusting that someone will catch you when they say they will? How do you know with some clarity that you've made the right decision?
skip to main |
skip to sidebar
I don't want to sell anything, buy anything, or process anything as a career. I don't want to sell anything bought or processed, or buy anything sold or processed, or process anything sold, bought, or processed, or repair anything sold, bought, or processed. You know, as a career, I don't want to do that.
About Me
Blogs I Like to Read
- Amy's Very Cool Homeschooling Family
- Ann Douglas
- Blogging Baby
- David Rhoden
- Domestic Psychology
- First Impressionist
- Jonathan Hickman
- Lemuria Books
- Mamas Ink
- Marrit Ingman
- Martini Made
- Meagan Francis
- Mo's Journal
- Remembering Ward
- Suburban Turmoil
- The Vol Abroad
- This Woman's Work
- Women's Health News
- Zygote Daddy
Good Stuff on Being a Parent/Family Life
Books I"ve written/contributed to
Blog Archive
-
▼
2005
(844)
-
▼
November
(62)
- republicans before lee atwater
- poem of the day
- creative people have more sex...
- early weaning in sub-sharan africa
- listening to today...
- elliot reads
- ouch
- celiac disease
- when the glass ceiling is at home
- parenting
- "AA - America's Stealth Religion"
- gay priests
- "I celebrated Thanksgiving in an old-fashioned way...
- for the girls
- mamasink
- Thanks Giving
- breastfeeding has significant impact on your risk ...
- breastfeeding isn't a lifestyle choice; it's a cri...
- Tennessee Valley Hunt
- Walk the Line
- the morning after pill
- Les raisons d'etre
- quote o' the afternoon
- the turkey baster
- i hope my obit is half as interesting...
- shopgirl
- Tim Lee Band
- dating down?
- when children attack
- the state of feminism today
- listening to today ...
- decisions, decisions
- baseball in knoxville?
- vanity
- breast and bottle
- are you self actualized?
- sondre lerche
- Last night, after getting RG sufficiently well fed...
- weisstronauts
- Speaking of breeders (below), you should buy this ...
- metrospirituality
- tilting at windmills
- makes elliot happy
- new pornographers
- so very, very wrong
- And today it's...
- Listening to today...
- sylvia
- a rant
- loss
- Currently listening to...
- home
- I'm a huge Johnny Cash fan and can't wait to see W...
- greek for me
- Here's an article about the surge in planned c-sec...
- Janeane Garafolo on Karl Rove:"The only interestin...
- interiors
- irony isn't pretty
- meet the breeders
- It's a Boy: Women Writers on Raising Sons
- NanoWriMo
- the halloween squash
-
▼
November
(62)
11 comments:
The best way I have found to know whether to trust someone to catch you when they say they will is to look at their track record. People don't generally change. Has this person upheld his or her obligations in the past? Has he/she been there for you? Is he/she helping you make your decision?
Good luck Katie. Big decisions are hard, but they are an inevitable part of being an adult. It feels good once you've decided and then my best advice is to never look back in a second guessing sort of way or you will make yourself and those around you crazy.
If you have to ask if someone will be there for you, you already know the answer.
When I was contemplating a move once, a friend said "Just remember, the highway runs in both directions." In my case, she mean't literally. In many situations, if you find you made the wrong choice, you can undo the mistake (to a certain extent, anyway). See if you can visualize the outcomes of both avenues you're considering. Sometimes, sleeping on it really does work, too. I've literally woken up in the morning with the clear answer to something that was boggling my mind the night before.
trust your gut instinct/women's intuition/internal compass. usually we really do know what to do - if we just let ourselves listen. hopefully what you want and what is best will be aligned. (and i agree about looking at someone's track record - nothing predicts future behavior more accurately than past performance.)
Instinct, Past references, lots of prayer!
Suzette
Oh! And you don't have to be in a hurry! Take your time!
Suzette
god, don't ask me. just remember somebody will be angry no matter what you decide.
Here's where a background in hazard analysis really comes in handy.
First, list the benefits for each course of action as well as the drawbacks. Assign a number to each, a higher number for a better outcome, a lower number for a worse outcome. Next, assign probabilities to each potential outcome. Now multiply the two numbers together and rank each action/outcome highest to lowest.
The top item on the list is the action that has the highest probability of the most favorable outcome.
Now, take that list and use it to paper train a puppy or something. It sounds to me like you are talking about relationship type decisions, and logic and analysis are pretty much worthless in this area.
Here's my philosophy, for whatever it's worth. A broken heart will heal; disappointment will fade eventually, but regret for a missed opportunity will haunt you for a lifetime. I'd rather take a chance and fail than miss a chance and always wonder.
Pray
Gather information, ponder pros, cons and potential consequences, then go with what feels right in my heart.
So nice to hear you're doing well... can't believe those big kids in the photos! Wasn't Elliot just born yesterday?
People can change but it usually takes a major "event" to cause big change over short time span....a good rule of thumb is that most people can only "fake it" for about 90 days. Give yourself (and them ) at least 3 months to see if the change is the real deal.
Some things like jobs have deadlines to make decisions- then you just have to make a consideration of the options and pray.
If it really is a good idea - it will still be a good idea in a few days or weeks or even months.
Post a Comment