dating sucks

Before I got married, in 1990, dating was fun. Now that I'm single again, in my 30s and the mother of three, it has thus far been a huge pain the ass. I've had a number of first dates, none of which were that great and some of which were truly awful.

The worst:

-The man who told me all about his major organ transplant -in EXTREMELY graphic detail - before the food came.

-The guy who told me that he would kill his ex-wife if he thought he could get away with it without getting caught.

-The date-from-hell who asked me if my breasts were real, after he had two beers (they are)

-The photographer who brought a flip-album of his work - consisting entirely of dozens of nude women and bizarre (and not very good) goth scenes and insisted I look at the entire thing and comment on each photo during our first meeting, which was supposed to be just casually getting together for drinks.

-The guy who told me he believes children -- especially boys -- NEED to be smacked around to "toughen them up"

-The creepiest of all: the blind-date set up via an acquaintance who lost all interest in getting together when I told him I would not be bringing my children. After he pressed me on the point,insisting he really wanted to meet my kids, I told him it was unlikely I would let ANYONE I went out with meet my children for many, many, many months -- until I knew that person really well. He never called again.


mamalife said...

Thank you for sharing your "dates from hell" stories... they are not funny at the time, but I think looking back they are. I got divorced in my mid-20' you, my ex cheated on me - I think there is no more efficient way to ruin someone's trust than to do this to them... spent the next 10 years single until I met my current husband when I was least looking and least expecting it. We are now parents of a beautiful 8 month old daughter. So don't give up - I hope you will find the love of your life in your future and will one day look back and realize all that happened was for the best, even though at the time it does not seem like it. Anyway, I also had my share of awful dates in those years - I used to joke I was going to write a book titled "There may be plenty of fish in the sea, but most of them have been swimming downstream from the nuclear power plant" - my favorite (looking back) was the date who showed up at my door TOTALLY drunk and reaking of beer - HELLO!! - what can someone be thinking??!!

Rich said...

I like the new digs, even if they are still blogger powered!*grin*

As for dating, it's not any more fun from the male side. Most of the women I've dated have can I put this politely...ummm...overzealous. They're looking for a commitment and they want it yesterday. One began crying when I couldn't tell her if I thought we might be moving towards marriage after 2 dates. Heck, it takes me more than two visits to a restaurant before I decide whether I like it or not; I'm certainly going to take more time when choosing a partner for life.

I used to say that I was afraid of growing old alone; now that I've been dating for a while, it doesn't sound half bad. *grin*

For now anyway, I either go out with friends and family, or if I'm feeling really roguish, I'll hit the town on my own. Good conversation improves a good meal, but a good book will do the job almost as well. Unless you get marinara sauce on the pages; that can be annoying. Although to be fair, it would probably be annoying to get marinara sauce on your date as well, so I guess that evens things out.

Finally, one very important tip for the first date; barbequed ribs are a bad idea. There's no way to maintain any kind of class while eating them, and it's hard to look suave with sauce dripping off your chin.

Trust me on this one.

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